Showing posts with label home. Show all posts
Showing posts with label home. Show all posts

Thursday

"The Book of Me, Written by You" - Do you have a safe place?

The prompt for the week is:    
Do you have a safe place?
The Brief:
  • This can be somewhere that you gravitate to, to make decisions or reflect
  • Somewhere you go to think
  • Somewhere you go to take time out
  • Somewhere you keep things you must not loose
  • Do you have more than one safe place?


This topic made me stop and think - do I have one? I know growing up I didn't feel very safe and I was constantly going from one place to the next.However, since marrying, I think I do have a few safe places.

Us in front of our house in 2012.
Our Home
 
The first one would probably be our home. Since I was born, I've never lived in a place more than 4 years in a row. However, since we married and bought our home, we've been here nearly 15 years and I think I'm starting to realize I don't have to worry about having to pack up all my belongings and moving them. I can put "roots" down and not have to worry about needing to pack up everything.

This is a video my husband took of the day we have bush fires close to us and he went to help.
 
Locked Briefcase
 
We keep all of our most important papers in this locked briefcase. The reasons behind this are pretty easy to understand - they are in one area and locked and during the summer months, if we need to evacuate the house because of bush fires, all of our important documents are already together. This takes the worry about needing time to put everything together. That being said, I do have all the really important paperwork scanned in and uploaded to an internet drive just in case something happens to the house while were not here. In fact, one year we had bush fires up the road from us and I had to get everything together in case we needed to evacuate and it was very easy to do because I had already thought of this.

Because of this, I always tell my IT classes, when we talk about internet drives, about how I had my paperwork together but was still worried about the actual documents because I hadn't scanned them in. However, now I have scanned them in and I don't have to worry about them because I can get to them anywhere if there is a fire and we loose the actual documents. That really sinks home as bush fires around us have been getting worse over the years.

I'd have to say, these are my top 2 safe places. Do you have one or more?


  Check back for the continuation of "The Book of me, Written by You" series.    

Friday

"The Book of Me, Written by You" - The feeling of home

This is a journey of finding yourself and how your loved ones see you in their eyes. Further, this can be online and carried forward to share, if you wish, to future generations.
This is a journey of finding yourself and how your loved ones see you in their eyes. Further, this can be online and carried forward to share, if you wish, to future generations. - See more at: http://joannfitz.blogspot.com.au/2013/09/the-book-of-me-written-by-you-topic-1.html#sthash.2TuO2bVu.dpuf
This is a journey of finding yourself and how your loved ones see you in their eyes. Further, this can be online and carried forward to share, if you wish, to future generations. - See more at: http://joannfitz.blogspot.com.au/2013/09/the-book-of-me-written-by-you-topic-1.html#sthash.2TuO2bVu.dpuf
The prompt for the week is:    
The feeling of home
The Brief:

Home means different things to different people, so this week we are going to explore what it means to us

  • What does it feel like?
  • How do you recognize it?
  • What makes it home - people, place, time

The most common phrase I always hear is "Home is where the heart is". Growing up, I didn't understand this concept. Even now, I think I understand it but it still feels foreign to me. This is confusing and I'll like to warn you, not everyone (within my family) will be happy to read some of the things below, but its what I feel.



I believe that home is what you make of it. Growing up, we had a place to live...and I visited my father on Sundays. Home? That is probably what I made out of those 2 places. That being said, we moved every 3-5 years when I was growing up, so once I started to feel comfortable, I guess would be the name of it, it would be time to move once again.

Early 1990s with a small group of my friends
Fast forward this to high school, and what I realized was that my physical address and the people in it might change, but my friends in school that were around me almost never did. If anything, there always seemed to be a few people that didn't belong any place so we accepted them into the group of us. There was one year when we moved from one part of the state to another, but that only lasted for about a year and then I went back to the original school and most of the group was still around, although people were changing and the one group was splitting bit by bit, but no matter what if anyone needed us we were all there for them.

We had a few issues within the family and then there was college at the local college I went to. The old group in school went their own ways and it seemed like I made what I could out of it. Made some new friends and learned quite a bit about relationships. In fact, one of the classes I took, psychology 101, actually went over relationships and why they are formed, etc. For me this was great because I started to understand people within the family and what they do and the reasons behind the way the groups and people were in high school. Interesting and informative.

By the time I was ready to complete my Associates Degree, I understood living compared to feeling accepted. Unfortunately I had both my in my life which is why I've always had the problem understanding the difference between a house to a home and the statement "Home is where the heart is" and I understand why.

A house can be a place you live and existing with common people which you have a relationship with. A home is where you find yourself completely accepted for who you are without reservation or judgement. This is why the term home is so difficult to understand for some people - if you don't have those types of relationships with a group of people then you wouldn't fully understand those statements.

Did I have a family that cares for me? Yes, but I never truly got the feeling as they accepted me completely and without reservations. They took care of me and made sure I had food, and a roof over the head, but the feelings? That's another story.
A few years ago - a group of my friends and I from high school

Over the last 10 plus years, I've reconnected with some of my friends in high school. The best thing about it is it feels like it hasn't been those many years since we last saw each other. It was great to feel that relaxed around people I grew up around.


So do I have a home? Yes, I believe once we got married, we truly have a home where everyone is welcome (to a degree which is a long and personal story), but everyone must be accepted and respected above all else because our family and friends which walk through the door are loved because of these things and that IS what a home is. I know as a person, all I've ever wanted was to be completely accepted.

Us in front of our home

 Check back for the continuation of "The Book of me, Written by You" series.  

Saturday

"The Book of Me, Written by You" - Your Childhood Home

This is a journey of finding yourself and how your loved ones see you in their eyes. Further, this can be online and carried forward to share, if you wish, to future generations.

This is a journey of finding yourself and how your loved ones see you in their eyes. Further, this can be online and carried forward to share, if you wish, to future generations. - See more at: http://joannfitz.blogspot.com.au/2013/09/the-book-of-me-written-by-you-topic-1.html#sthash.2TuO2bVu.dpuf
This is a journey of finding yourself and how your loved ones see you in their eyes. Further, this can be online and carried forward to share, if you wish, to future generations. - See more at: http://joannfitz.blogspot.com.au/2013/09/the-book-of-me-written-by-you-topic-1.html#sthash.2TuO2bVu.dpuf
The prompt for the week is:  
Your Childhood Home

The Brief
The Brief
The Brief: 
When did you leave home?
Where was it?
Where did you move to?
Was it rented or owned? – with parents/Grandparents
Was it inherited
What was it like – describe it – each room.
Were there a favourite room?
Is there anything you particularly remember from the house?
Pictures
The road & area

Where was it located?

When I was born, my parents had recently bought the house and picked the location which was near where they actually grew up. As my father was in the US Navy, they were sent all over the US, which depended on where my father was sent, and we had a house in various military housing neighbourhoods. 

By the time I came along, my mother was tired of packing up and moving from base to base, so they decided to buy the house where they lived when I was born. It was purchased, with my grandmother's help (my father's mother Jean) and the savings they had. 

Like I mentioned above, it was in the area where both my parents grew up. My father was raised around Linden, New Jersey and then when he was around 10, the whole family unit moved from there to Newburgh, New York,  where he stayed until he met and married my mother. Shortly after, he joined the US Navy and the moving was on. 

Linden, NJ Map

My mother, on the other hand, was born in Pike, Pennsylvania.  She moved to Newburgh, New York when she was about 10 as well. From then onwards, she lived around the area until she met my father and he joined the US Navy and moved with him. 
Pike, PA Map

As I said and showed in an earlier post, I was born while living in Newburgh, New York. At that point, all my sisters, brother, mother. and when he wasn't on the submarine, my father all lived in the house. 
Taken from Wikipedia

What did the house look like?

The house looked small from the outside, but was actually pretty spacious. When you walked into the front door, you were taken into a huge living room area. At one point this room had a flat window, but my father later changed it to a bay window. There was a window on the side of the house which looked out onto the driveway and next door's lawn. This area lead you into both the dining room and kitchen areas. In the dining room, it once had just a door going out to the backyard; however, while growing up my father changed this to a sliding door. The kitchen was pretty small overall. It had a sit at table with the refridgerator at the end of it - giving you just enough room to open the door and walk by it. Next to that was the sink which had a window looking out to the backyard. Next to that was a small bench which had storage and then the oven. The phone was on the wall next to the table, which always seemed to have mail and other paperwork on it. Then you could walk out of a doorway and be looking at the door which we walked into. 

Next you had a choice - up stairs or downstairs. First we'll go upstairs. At the top of the 10 or so steps up, you had the bathroom. It was just big enough to hold the toilet, a sink next to that and the combination of bathtub/shower. Walking back out of there you looked directly into a small room straight ahead - it was only about 7 steps to the door. To the left of the door was a linen closet. Anyhow getting back to the room, it was small. Enough for a small dresser and a single bed and not much else. This used to be my room, before my mother left my father (they eventually divorced). I can still see the small plastic picture of that was the only thing in the room - a small tiny Jack Russell type of dog with very sad eyes that looked like he was going to cry, which was understandable due to it looked like someone left him in an alley with no food. 

Anyhow, when you turn to leave that room, you make a right after about a step on the left there was a wall but it was once a laundry shoot. I remember growing up, we used put things down the shoot - at one time it was my brother (I watched), we put some boxer puppies down it, and a list of other things. I remember my mother and grandmother always yelling about what they'd find when they went to do laundry. After taking another 2 steps, you had bigger bedrooms - one of the left and one of the right. The one on the left was the one my sister's shared and the one of the right was the one my brother had. 

Upon returning to where we had the choice of upstairs and downstairs, we will now go downstairs. This has changed over time. When I was born, it had wood paneling on the left and a handrail on the right and went down about 15 steps. At the bottom of the stairs, on your left you had the laundry room, with the laundry shoot and small crawl space I was always playing in when I was a kid. 

Take about 3 steps and the other door was to another bedroom. This was the one my parents shared when we were growing up. It had an attached bathroom that included a sink, toilet (which had a handle made like a spring and you pressed that down to flush the toilet), and bathtub/shower combined. In later years, the bathtub/shower became just a shower.

The rest of the room was a game room with a bar with alcohol in it. At first it just had a room big enough for a small sofa with a TV on a stand with some sitting room on the floor and the bar with some bar chairs. However, my father then built onto it enough to have a game room - and big enough to hold a full sized pool table. There was a small window looking out to the other side of the house and a door leading to stairs going up about 15 or so into the backyard. This was the room which they always had their holiday parties, as I mentioned in my last post
 
1970's - Me with boxer pups, my grandmother looking on in front of the house in Newburgh, NY
The house was located almost at the end of a cul de sac on Fleetwood Drive. It was a different street - you had a party house on one side, on the other side a house left to riot with windows boarded up and doors that were broken from the hinges. There were 3 regular looking houses around the cul de sac a gap where there was a field and then more regular looking houses on the other side of the street to us. As you can tell, the street held about a dozen houses.
2013 - What the house looks like today in Newburgh, NY

When did you move?
My mother, middle sister, brother and I all moved out when my mother left my father in 1975, I believe. She had stored some money up and left while my father was at work during the night. My sister, brother and I left very early the next morning - we were running out the back of the game room when he was walking in the front door. 

Like I mentioned, my mother had limited funds and so we ended up moving in with my oldest sister while she looked for work to afford a place. This was in Walden, New York. We finally were able to move out of my sister's place in 1976, I think it was. 

We then moved about every 3-5 years around Walden, Montgomery, and Maybrook all located in New York. 

My father, on the other hand, lived in this house until he moved in 1994.

When did you leave your mother's "roof"?
I left from under my mother's roof, the first time, when I went to SUNY Institute of Technology at Utica Rome in Utica, New York in 1995. I went here to get my Bachelor's degree - only I ended up never completing it. 

The second time was when I left the US and moved to Australia to get married to my husband in 1997. As I'm still in Melbourne, it was a good choice.

I hope you enjoyed your tour of the house when I was born.

Check back next week for the continuation of "The Book of me, Written by You" series.   - See more at: http://joannfitz.blogspot.com.au/#sthash.KPTGu0so.dpuf
Check back next week for the continuation of "The Book of me, Written by You" series. 
Check back next week for the continuation of "The Book of me, Written by You" series.   - See more at: http://joannfitz.blogspot.com.au/#sthash.KPTGu0so.dpuf